Featured Image Credit: Bravo
Topics: TV And Film, Reality TV, Australia
Rhianna Benson
Back in 2019, Below Deck star Ashton Pienaar hit headlines all over the world after exhibiting violence during an incident while filming, which aired on television.
Now, in an admission that fans are praising, the TV personality has seemingly taken responsibility for his actions, lifting the lid on the vital life lessons that the outburst taught him.
The incident which set viewers' tongues wagging first aired all the way back in December 2019.
The scene in question saw Pienaar and several other crew members travelling home after a night out in Thailand, where they'd indulged in drinking and dancing.
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Several minutes into the journey, however, and Pienaar - who'd previously been a firm favourite on the show among fans - could be seen yelling at colleague Kate Chastain before punching the windows of the vehicle.
Speculation was rife at the time over what had prompted such a severe reaction, with many believing it was sparked by Kate rejecting a kiss from him.
Pienaar shut this rumour down, however, telling Decider: "The thing that made me upset that night was that she made a reference to my mother and a letter that she wrote to the crew last year and that’s what set me off."
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He also claimed: "I stood up to her on certain things this season that she didn’t like and I think that could be where the animosity is coming from."
Pienaar also apologised for his behavior during the Below Deck reunion.
Since Pienaar left the Bravo series, he has launched a pretty impressive career as a fitness coach and influencer.
It wasn't until this week, however, that he has taken a heartfelt look back at the incident by reacting to the footage.
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In the clip, Pienaar explained: "Here's how a teary conversation in the kitchen with my wife finally helped me understand why I screamed at a woman and punched a car door five years ago."
It was then that Pienaar looked back at another clip - describing it as 'even worse' - which saw him in a TV interview claim at the time he is 'not that person' from the controversial footage.
"This was the big struggle for me," he admitted. "I felt as if this behaviour came through me, but wasn't actually of me.
"I had done a lot of therapy after the show, but this specific incident didn't necessarily 'come up'."
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The Aussie star went on to claim that 'the truth' only emerged after he and his wife discussed the possibility of having children.
"I was too scared to be a father," Pienaar said.
"I was too scared of being a role model to my kids and not have this angry part of me actually figured out, because that meant possibly exposing my own kids to the violence that had plagued by own life growing up."
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He continued: "This is really huge for me to share, but seeing my behaviour in this moment transported me back in time to the moments that I was in rooms with my own family, fighting, furniture flying, holes being punched through doors.
"And here I was, creating the same kind of environment. Shame is what kept me from being able to face these demons. It was hard for me because it dealt with my relationship I had with my father."
Pienaar continued: "I had to unravel my past conditioning. I had to see it, understand it, process why this happened to finally free myself.
"And this is so that I could support my kids to become the best versions of themselves one day, without my trauma holding them back."
Since then, Pienaar has been inundated with messages from fans, commending him for his admission.
"Well done Ashton! We are far more than the bad moments in our lives or the bad reactions we have," one gushed in the comments.
Another added: "Such a huge thing to be proud of Ashton. Breaking generational cycles is SO hard. It’s also really scary to face our own demons."
A third commented: "Wow. Thanks for sharing and being vulnerable Ashton. Keep up the hard work."