A mum has been receiving some criticism online for letting her kid watch hours and hours of stuff on the iPad every day because of her partner.
First off, don’t tell people how to parent their kids – you don’t have to agree with how they do it, but broadly, unless there’s something really bad going on, you aren’t going to get a good reaction if you pick them up on something.
Kids also really like watching things on the iPad or on the TV, and anyone who has kids will tell you that it’s a great way to keep them occupied and – more importantly – quiet for a while.
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That means that the grown-ups can do stuff around the house, grab something to eat or an extra hour in bed, or – imagine this – have an adult conversation in a restaurant or café.
Still, some people are really hot on how much kids should watch, as this woman found out.
Sharing her story on Mumsnet’s ‘AIBU’ – Am I Being Unreasonable? – forum, she said: “I’m expecting some flames…and I will listen to it. I know it’s not great. But I’m also curious if people have non-judgemental views about iPad use?
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“Our DD [dear daughter] is nearly 2.5 and watches A LOT of iPad every day...Hours of it.
“It’s the go-to for her otherwise very present and engaging and loving and affectionate father."
She continued: "But, here’s the thing…I think she’s actually pretty advanced in language and numeracy.
“She can name all but 3 or 4 letters of the alphabet (which we haven’t actively taught her).
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“She gets lots of other activities and time outside, lots of mummy and daddy time and crafts etc. So we’re not awful parents. I don’t think!
“But interested to hear if we’re still rotting her brain and social abilities, or if she’s getting the pay-off from so much learning (and evident enjoyment).”
Well, here come the opinion-havers.
One person said: “This is absolutely unacceptable. Why would you allow this? Because it keeps her quieter so you have an easier life?
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“I have a 2.5 year old too. There’s no way I would even dream of letting her have a tablet yet, let alone use it for hours every day.”
A second person wrote: “'It’s the go-to for her otherwise very present and engaging and loving and affectionate father.'
“Can you see the oxymoron in this statement? Hours in front of the iPad is the go-to for an engaging parent?”
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And a third simply wrote: “Whatever happened to books?”
However, not everyone was like that.
Another comment said: “I don’t see anything wrong with it personally. As long as it’s educational stuff they’re doing/watching and not just the Teletubbies all day.
“My disabled daughter has always loved her iPad and thanks to it, she can type really well despite having brain damage and learning difficulties.
“I don’t think doing crafts all day and playing with dolls and cars is necessarily any better.”
The moral of the story is probably that loads of different people have loads of differing opinions on just about everything you can think of.
The other moral – potentially more important – is not to go looking for parenting advice on Mumsnet.
Tom Wood