One of the world’s leading divorce lawyers has lifted the lid on what ‘slippage’ means in a marriage, and how it can completely destroy a relationship.
James Sexton, 52, wants potential clients to understand that small, gradual shifts can turn even the most successful marriage into one that requires his assistance.
The attorney, who has drawn a huge online following due to his no-nonsense approach to relationship advice, recently appeared on an episode of Steven Bartlett’s Diary of a CEO podcast to discuss marriage.
The recent instalment is entitled ‘Divorce Expert: Slippage Is Tearing Marriages Apart! If Kids Are Your Priority You’ll Divorce!’ and sees the New York-based legal advisor discussing what he means by ‘slippage’.
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“You’ve used this word ‘slippage’ before,” began Steven, 32. “When does it happen? And what does slippage mean?”
James replied by likening the slow decline of a relationship to that of putting on weight: “Everyone understands slippage I think. It’s not like you eat cake and then the next day your suit doesn’t fit.
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“You just make lots of little choices and those little choices add up and all of a sudden you’re suit doesn’t fit. You go ‘wait, when did that happen?’ I think it’s the same thing in relationships.”
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James went on to say that almost all marriages start out with ‘good intentions’ but that focus can slowly but surely be redirected to other things.
“When you were single finding ‘the one’ was big and then you found them,” he continued.
“And then there’s just a whole bunch of high-fiving and celebration. It’s so great and then you go ‘All right, we got that. Now what other stuff?’”
The expert revealed that new career prospects and travelling can make you switch off from your relationship once the honeymoon phase is complete.
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“When that fades and now we’re in a sustainable pattern of a relationship and you’re focusing on other things, little tiny things start to, you know.
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“And you don’t want to make a thing of it. You don’t want to say ‘Oh, by the way, calling a foul here’… No, you sort of just go ‘I don’t know, it’s a little thing’.
“I think that is how the process begins,” the divorce lawyer concluded. “It leads right to my office.”
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James’ insight into how slippage can result in a split has been shared on TikTok - encouraging many users to rush to the comments section to have their say.
“To anyone considering marriage, ask your partner if they would still marry you if you don’t want a huge wedding,” advised one viewer.
“Just the 2 of you (plus your kids if you have them), but no guests & no party.”
Meanwhile, a YouTube user and fellow divorce attorney typed: “So much of what James is saying about marriage, divorce, and relationships is spot on. I’m really happy there is a platform to get the message out directly from a divorce lawyer’s perspective. Great video!”
And a second commented: “Man I could listen to this guy ALL day, just so much wisdom and experience oozing from James that I always walk away with a more understanding of life and myself. Love him!”
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“I love hearing his way of thinking,” gushed someone else. “He’s probably my favourite guest of yours. He instantly brings everyone back down to earth and brings gratitude and love.”
However, another TikTok user remarked: "I call the fouls and trust me it doesn’t help."
Topics: Sex and Relationships, Advice, Wedding, Celebrity, TikTok
Ella Scott