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Topics: Life, Sex and Relationships, Real Life, iPhone
Rhiannon Ingle
Topics: Life, Sex and Relationships, Real Life, iPhone
Many of us use abbreviations in our everyday life.
Whether that's LOL, BRB or G2G - it's clear the short-cut communication style is only growing in popularity following the advent of phones.
However it seems, in some cases, abbreviations - or code names - can sometimes do way more harm than good after one woman ended up marriage after 10 years upon finding out husband called her SWMBO in text messages.
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She opened up about why she left her husband after finding out his text nickname for her.
Let's not lie, we've all been there, our gaze accidentally - or non-accidentally in some cases - falling on an image, Instagram DM or text message we weren't meant to see on our other half's device.
And hell hath no fury like a woman who finds something she would rather not have seen on her partner's mobile phone.
One woman even decided to end her marriage over a nickname for her she discovered when her husband's phone bleeped while he was in the shower.
Before finding the text, the woman admitted the dynamic between her and her partner had already shifted after they welcomed a baby.
Taking to Mama Mia anonymously, she explained that 'nothing changed' for her husband when their son was born and that he continued to play 'Thursday night sport,' have 'long Friday lunches' as well as 'Friday night drinks' and she tried to support him '100 percent in his role of breadwinner for [their] family'.
However, tension grew between her and her husband because he 'absolutely hated telling [her] what his plans were' and 'claimed he didn't have to'.
The woman was subsequently left at a loss as to when her husband would join her and their son and this led to the pair fighting a lot.
The text message she discovered was the cherry on the cake.
One Friday morning, the woman's husband was in the shower and his phone 'kept pinging' so she decided to check it incase it was urgent.
Instead of being about an emergency, the woman saw a message was from a group chat between her husband and his 'sporting club mates' arranging a 'do over' that night, having already had a heavy one the night before.
Her husband had woken up at 8:00am and gone straight into the shower 'without checking' on her or their two-year-old but had managed to ping off one reply to his group chat: "Don’t think I can make it tonight. SWMBO will say no."
The woman was left baffled. What on earth did 'SWMBO' mean?
Not only confused by the nickname but also 'annoyed' by the shifting of blame - her husband not having even spoken to her about going out - the woman decided to confront him.
"He wasn’t mad I’d looked at his phone. He was totally unmoved by having to explain the message to me," the woman continued. "'It means 'She Who Must Be Obeyed',' he said, casually."
She added: "I felt like I'd been slapped in the face."
The woman then voiced how unfair she thought it was for her husband to make it out like he had to 'obey' her or 'ask permission' as if 'he's a teenager and [she's] his mother'.
"It’s called respect. Courtesy in checking to see if you’re needed - to say what your plans are," she said. "Otherwise, how is that a family?"
Left 'mortified' at his nickname for her - it was made worse by no one in the chat questioning the abbreviation, insinuating he'd used it before - the woman knew 'there was no coming back'.
She resolved: "I was never, ever, going to kiss, let alone sleep with, a man who called me that after 10 years together - even after becoming the mother of his son. This was no longer just about me: We deserved better.
"[...] Staying with a man who valued us so little wasn’t an option. I took my baby and I left my husband the next week."
If you're experiencing distressing thoughts and feelings, the Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) is there to support you. They're open from 5pm–midnight, 365 days a year. Their national number is 0800 58 58 58 and they also have a webchat service if you're not comfortable talking on the phone.