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Topics: Reddit, Sex and Relationships
Emma Rosemurgey
Topics: Reddit, Sex and Relationships
It's fair to say that not all of us can spot red flags when they're staring us in the face. In fact, sometimes, it takes removing yourself from a situation to make you look back and go, 'what on Earth was I thinking?'
But while some people need to take themselves off to Specsavers to get a major checkup, one woman is being praised for spotting her partner's red flag and removing herself from the situation immediately.
You might be thinking he refused to peel an orange for her (thanks TikTok) or didn't bring her a snack back from the shop, but this woman's situation is the definition of a red flag, after he repeatedly joked about murdering her. Oh, and dismembering her body.
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Out of context, it sounds pretty horrifying, but even when the woman took to Reddit to explain, her now-ex's behaviour seriously raises a lot of questions, and none of them are good.
Taking to the r/TwoXChromosomes forum, she revealed the man she'd been dating had joked about murdering her a number of times in the first few weeks they were dating, which understandably made her anxious.
"He’s very sarcastic and has dark humour. But to me it wasn’t funny and caused me anxiety because I know the statistics. I talked to him about this," she wrote.
"I told him repeatedly, 'Stop joking about killing me.' He kept on with the jokes, until I finally told him that those jokes literally scare me. He apologised and seemed to feel bad that his jokes made me scared of him."
Although her plea seemed to have gotten through to her partner, everything came to a head shortly before she wrote the post, when they ended up being around three hours late to meet up with her boyfriend's brother.
"When I was talking to him about us being late, I noticed he sighed deeply, clenched his fist and looked down at it, as if he were making the conscious choice to not punch me," she continued.
"Then, as I was saying goodbye to his brother, he comes into the room and says, 'She should say her permanent goodbyes!' I asked him WTF? He said it was a joke. I asked, how’s it funny? What’s the punch line? Please explain to me how that was supposed to be funny?
"He couldn’t answer... I didn’t want to get in the car with him. I walked off and thankfully my roommate picked me up and drove me home."
Understandably, the pretty horrifying comments were enough to force the woman into walking away from the relationship after she tried to speak to him about the very real homicide rates of women being murdered by their male partners, but instead he tried to gaslight her into believing she was the problem.
After asking fellow Reddit users what they would've done in her situation, the woman was inundated with comments praising her for walking away before anything more sinister took place.
"I’m glad you left, his jokes are not remotely normal even for someone with a dark sense of humour. Even if it was just a joke, He should have completely stopped the second he realised you didn’t like it," one wrote.
Another added: "Just remember, there’s a lot of murdered women that once said, 'He’d never do that to me'."
A third agreed: "You have every right to break up with someone who makes jokes that scare you.
"However, I think what's more concerning is the threat of violence from the closed fist and the f*** you during a conversation. I think this guy, at a minimum, is incredibly immature but could also very easily have become violent with you. You did the right thing."