A mum has opened up about why she took her daughter out of nursery when staff ignored her requests to not hug her little one when she got upset.
The mum, Sophea Manzl, took to Kidspot to open up about the situation and how she felt after the teacher ignored her 'no touching' rule.
She also offered fellow parents some advice on how to handle similar nursery dilemmas.
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She began by explaining that her child has 'never liked being touched'.
"Even as a baby she wasn't very cuddly with anyone," Sophea added. "Of course, she gives her mummy and daddy cuddles… even then she wasn’t the type of kid that you could cuddle to sleep or snuggle on the couch with."
According to the mum, her three-year-old daughter 'especially despises' when other people give her cuddles or try to touch her and tells her parents: "I only cuddle mummy, daddy and nanny."
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So, when she started at a new daycare centre, Sophea alerted the staff members of her daughter's wishes and informed them she 'does not like cuddles' and that 'they should never try to hold her or cuddle her to help her calm down'.
"I know some other babies, even my son who is one, love cuddles and feel safe that way, but my daughter doesn’t," the mum went on.
Instead, Sophea provided the nursery teachers with a 'list of other tools' they could arm themselves with to help the toddler 'feel safe', including her favourite toy, a book and providing a 'quiet space in the corner by herself'.
She also told staff they should give her child 'some space and time so she can come over when she is ready' but told them, under no circumstance, 'do not cuddle' her.
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However, such requests were not followed.
The mum claimed: "To my absolute disgust, they didn't listen. And because of this we decided to leave.
"I'll never forget looking through the window out to the outside area where all the kids play, and seeing the teacher picking my daughter up and trying to hug her.
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"My daughter was absolutely beside herself."
Sophea said her child was left 'terrified' by the whole scream and was 'screaming', 'kicking' and 'yelling'.
"I had specifically asked them not to do something to help my daughter feel safe and they went against our wishes," the mum continued.
"At the time, I tried to be understanding and brushed it off. I mentioned it again to the manager and made it clear to that teacher not to do it again."
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However, according to Sophea, staff still didn't listen and 'kept offering' her daughter cuddles which resulted in the child crying.
She acknowledged: "Yes there are a lot of children in the room, I understand it would be hard to remember everything. I have a huge respect for all teachers, my husband is a teacher, but this was different.
"I felt like I was constantly repeating myself and fighting so hard just to help my daughter feel safe at childcare. It shouldn’t be this hard to help each child feel safe? It didn’t feel right to me."
After initially waiting out the process about 'one month later', Sophea found her daughter 'never settled in' and told her: "I don’t like my teachers mum. I don’t like when they cuddle me."
The mum revealed: "It hit me like a tonne of bricks. She didn’t feel safe. She was terrified to go and was having terrible anxiety every single time we went. My heart broke. And so, I took her out of daycare."
Sophea has since said she was 'so glad' she made the decision and enrolled her child in another place instead.
"I went in to talk with the teachers at the new place and explained our situation," she went on. "They were incredible. They set up a quiet, comfortable space for her with cushions, books and no other people around.
"They let her sit back and watch until she was comfortable to join in any activities. They let me hang around as much as I needed to.
"They even read a book to my daughter about another child who doesn’t like being touched."
Then, after a 'few weeks' at the new nursery, Sophea's daughter told her: "I like my teachers mum, they know I don’t like hugs."
The mum explained that her daughter feeling 'safe' was the 'most important thing' to her.
"She is a whole new child and is enjoying her days, making friends, and there are absolutely no tears at drop off," Sophea concluded before advising: "Go with your gut parents, if something doesn’t feel right to you… change it."
Rhiannon Ingle