A former sex worker has shared the three main reasons why married men cheat and what they’re looking for elsewhere.
It’s a question countless women have tried to answer since the dawn of time, however retired escort Samantha X has now shared her two cents.
“I know why husbands cheat, I know what they secretly desire and I know what goes on in their minds,” she tells Mail Online.
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Samantha used to work as a journalist on national magazines before giving up her ‘normal life’ in her thirties for undisclosed reasons.
Despite what you may think about married men stepping outside of their marriage, Samantha says its not always as simple as looking for sex.
“As an escort, I didn’t swing from chandeliers or go to secret dungeon sex clubs (disappointing, I know). The service that was requested most was the girlfriend experience – and that meant listening, supporting, and guiding,” she shared.
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So, a lot of men are basically looking for companionship, according to Samantha, who says the worst thing you can do for your relationship is ‘walking down the aisle and getting married’.
However, Samantha warns it’s ‘not all men, not all marriages and it is never your fault’.
Here are her reasons why a man might seek a sex worker:
1. They want to talk about their feelings
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Although we all think that men don’t like to open up about their feelings, Samantha says they like to talk… a lot!
“They are emotional and extremely vulnerable. They tell me they’re too scared to be vulnerable at home, and instead feel they need to be the ‘strong one’,” she says.
Men often worry that opening up about their problems may cause ‘undue stress’ for their partner and have told Samantha they ‘don’t want to be judged’ when asked for the reason why they avoided getting in touch with a counsellor.
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Instead of speaking with a significant other or paying a counsellor for some sessions, they confide in an escort instead.
2. They miss foreplay
Samantha says men aren’t simply looking for a quick hook up when they use the services of an escort. While the retired sex worker says she’d ‘rather have a cup of tea these days’, she understands why sex is no longer a priority for many couples. The role for an escort, according to Samantha, is ‘to be a lady of pleasure’.
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"Men secretly want to spend hours in bed with you but say they got sick of being rejected,” she said. “They miss foreplay (pleasuring you not the other way round) and they don't always want it all to be over before you can say 'pass me the TV controls, MAFS is on'."
3. They are aware of you cheating
Men aren’t the only ones who cheat when it comes to relationships, Samantha says it’s just that men are often ‘the ones that get caught’.
One man in his fifties hired Samantha simply to vent about the fact his wife had an affair with her personal trainer and she ran off with him.
While another man was left in a rut when his wife left him and the kids and he had no idea how to ‘boil an egg’.
"While a wife may turn a blind eye to her husband's slip up, men won't. Their ego won't allow it. If they stay (and men rarely leave), they will see that as a green light to do what they want so you are 'quits',” Samantha says.
Just because your hubby has hired an escort, it doesn’t mean that he wants to end the relationship, Samantha says.
"They don't want to leave you for another woman and they most certainly don't want to run off with an escort (and no escort in the history of this earth would ever want to run off with your husband either – that's like taking your work home with you).
"Men are like puppies that chew your shoes, they just can't help themselves."
Topics: Life, Sex and Relationships, Wedding