A man is being slammed after telling his fiancée he’s less attracted to her now that she’s pregnant.
The anonymous dad-to-be discussed his current situation in a lengthy Reddit post, which begins with him admitting that he does ‘not understand lying’ and not having ‘tactfulness’.
His fiancée is 7 months pregnant and he says in his post that they are both ‘very excited to be parents’. However, ‘the pregnancy has put a strain on certain aspects of our relationship, primarily sexually’.
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He explains: “We used to have sex at least thrice a week. Since she’s begun showing, we’ve gone down to maybe once every other week. I’m not overly bothered by it and I thought she wasn’t either.
“I rationalized the decrease to her being more tired now that she’s growing a person in her and things becoming more sensitive.”
He explains that this wasn’t the case as his fiancée’s ‘wants to have sex more than we used to before pregnancy’ but he hasn’t been able to ‘oblige’ - despite trying - which has led to him rejecting ‘her advances’.
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“I’ve done my best to oblige but we haven’t been doing it as much as she wants and now it’s clearly on me,” he said about his wife wanting to have more sex.
“Yesterday I rejected her advances and she got upset and told me that she doesn’t feel beautiful anymore since I won’t touch her. I told her that I still of course think she’s beautiful. She then asked me if I thought she was still sexy. I told her that she was indeed sexy. But then she asked me if I want physical her less now than when she was pregnant.
So as the title implies. I did tell her that I did want to have sex with her as much as now. But I assumed this was a normal feeling. Pregnant woman [sic] are built for function.”
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As you can imagine, the man's admission did not go down very well.
“So I told her that I found her more sexually attractive before she was pregnant. She cries calls me every name she can think off, gets out of bed and throws some clothes on and goes to her parents place. She’s now not returning my texts or calls. I want to apologize and assure her that it’s not her fault and how she looks now has no bearing on my love for her. What should I do?
Reddit users were outraged by the thread, with one person responding: “For the love of God DO NOT 'assure her that it’s not her fault and how she looks now has no bearing on my love for her'... Just don’t."
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In response to the man asking for advice, a Reddit user wrote: “You walked right into that one. Time to grovel and finally figure out how to be more tactful, you knew it was a problem but you did nothing to fix it.”
While a third user shared: “The problem here isn’t that you ‘don’t know how to lie’, but that you lack empathy for everything your fiancé is experiencing, and you aren’t even trying to be more mindful of the impact your words have during a time when she is very hormonal, emotional, and likely overwhelmed with all her body changes, even though you acknowledge you’re a tactless person. I hope you see this as an opportunity to learn to be more considerate of your partner.”
Gregory Robinson